Since Randy Pausch only had months to live, there were several concerns coming up in his head. What Randy worried about most was that his children, who were six, three, and eighteen-month, were too young to remember all about him. Randy wanted his children at least to know how much he loved them.
I used to think about a question: If I have little memory of my beloved family who is about to die because of illness or die because of an accident, will I feel less grieving about losing family because I almost have zero memory of them. The answer I have is "yes" once. However, as I grow up, I realize that grief cannot depend on how much interaction we have or how deep our relationship is. After all, we're family. For example, a three-year-old girl lost her father before she could have more memory and interaction with her dad. She hardly feels grieving even though she knows the person she should call daddy doesn't exist anymore. A kid is too young to handle the death of her father. Grief is not coming, it's just coming later. During the little girl's upbringing, she cries a lot whenever she feels like needing a father instead of just a mother. She wells up when missing her dad so bad. Even when the little girl is an adult, sometimes she is down in the dumps when trying to recall her little memory about daddy or imagine what life would be like with daddy. What I say above could be the possible scenarios for Randy's children. Although everyone has various ways to see and deal with losing someone, I think one thing is sure–it takes time to get over the grief, no matter how late or early it comes.
Oops, my last log is not supposed to be this heavy. This book reminds me of some experiences, so I relate to it quite strongly. (hahaha)
At first, I didn't agree with what you said, "Grief cannot depend on how much interaction we have or how deep our relationship is. After all, we're family." Because I think memory took a lot of parts on how much you missed a person. However, After seeing the scenario you gave, I agree with your point to some degree. In my opinion, it all depends on the "status" of the person in your heart. Father takes an important role in a family(in most cases), so Randy's children would feel sad that they lost him. Nevertheless, if there is a cousin that they didn't have many memories with, though they are still family, the grief they felt would be much less compared to their father.
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